As if this wasn't bad enough.

I found out I was having a miscarriage nearly 3 weeks ago. It was normal as far as I know for a miscarriage and then 2 weeks into that it got bad again. Heavy bleeding started again. So last Saturday we went and saw the Dr. and did an ultra sound to make sure there wasn't still a viable pregnancy and also to check and make sure there wasn't any tissue left. He let me know the only reason he can think to have bleeding in that pattern is if we may have been pregnant with twins and miscarried at different times. As if dealing with one miscarriage isn't bad enough...add another right on top 2 weeks later. Oh fun.

Michael and I weren't trying to get pregnant but we've only really ever tried to get pregnant 3 times out of 7 pregnancies. And only 1 of those ended with a baby in our arms.

I'm grateful to have a knowledge of a greater plan. In retrospect things always work out how they should:)

Curve Ball anyone?

Well I have now had more miscarriages than I have children.

I had an infection with my IUD and had to have it removed and with in 2 days I knew I was pregnant. a few weeks later that intuition was proven correct. Well it wasn't too long after that when I had a very large clot pass and then the cramping set in. I have been trying to keep a happy face but this is never a simple easy thing.

If I didn't know my body as well as I do I probably would not have even known and just thought I was pretty late. But with 6 pregnancies in the past 3 years I can tell usually by the first few days.

I didn't realize I wanted another baby already I thought I wanted to wait. Once I found out about the new one I was thinking time lines with school and Michael and how we would do this and now I'm just sad. Most of the time I am fine and really almost no one knows but then every once in a while it will blindside me. This is not my first rodeo with this mess. I have been through this 3 previous times, one of those times was horrific for me, but it still is not fun.

I'll be fine, we'll be fine.